...

Today, on my way home, I allowed myself to get lost on campus. i just wanted to get lost, probably for the same reason why at times i leave my cell phone at home... to get away from people.
It's hard for me to get lost in the surroundings that I'm familiar with. I can easily find a direction that I have to get moving.  Well, having S<->N direction, I can always tell which way i have to go if I need to find my home or some other place i need to be.
I dont try to get lost often...only once or twice a year, and try to do it before the winter. Luckily for me, today all of the reasons led to my absence from a crowd.
I've never thought of what I'm looking for when "i'm gone". Probably I want to go to "no place" to look for something or nothing. Because of my morals, i dont drink or do drugs to get lost, but i need the same feeling. I need feeling of euphoria. It took me some time to finally understand why i do this...i need an "exhaust" for my negative energy.
So, today when I've tried to do the same routine...  I've failed!